How Oliver are you?

How awesome are you?

1 You wake up late for work, and arrive at the train station, just as the train fucking leaves. What the FUCK do you do?
2 You recieve a text from somebody you like, telling you that they don't like you "In that way". what the SHIT do you do?!
3 The Greeks... Please discuss.
4 You are reading a novel, when a FUCKING bird flies past, steals your FUCKING book, takes it to a FUCKING TREE and starts reading the FUCKING ENDING! What the FLYING FUCK DO YOU DO?!
5 An Aussie approaches you, and begins to explain to you, that Football, is infact called Soccer. What the FUCK do you do?!
6 You are in a sinking ship with an Aussie and a Swede. The ship will float if one person leave the boat. If nobody leaves however, you all die a horrible death. What the FUCK do you do?
7 Music is best when..?